DISCLAIMER the content and character below is fictional. This is a blog segment where we write a monologue or story depicting fictional characters . Feel free to use your imagination and create a character background and add to the story. We hope you enjoy playing with it Hunnies.

Outside My Window #2 – If I were a slime would you still love me?

Couples like to ask these bizarre questions to spice up, I suppose their relationship and keep each other on their toes ( my single ass can’t relate). A viral trend has been circling on social media such as Tik Tok which has funny couples shenanigans to stir the pot during quarantine and start arguments for fun! And one them is asking your partner “would you love me if I were worm?”… followed by *silence*. Now, I wanted to take a spin from “would you still love me if I were a worm?” and instead ask my beloved friends and family this burning question “Would you still love if I were a slime?” and make it into a monologue.

 I watch a lot of anime and a particular one crosses my mind: Tensei Shitara Slime Datta Ken or The Time I Got Reincarnated As a Slime which came out in 2018 (I highly recommend). It’s about a sad lonely thirty-seven-year-old Satoru Mikami with a dead-end job who gets stabbed on the streets of Japan and wakes up in an alternate universe as a slime. Now he gets lucky because his viscous body can actually absorb flowers for nutrients and absorb other creatures and morph into their bodies. I do not want to spoil it for you any further and these are the things you discover in the first 10 minutes of the pilot. However, unlike Mikami I have always wondered what I would be reincarnated into and because I thought becoming a slime was hilarious and unconventional I decided to make this story about it.

For my confused thespians/ friends who have no clue what a slime is:

“any ropy or viscous liquid matter, especially of a foul kind.”- Dictionary.com

“soft moist earth or clay especially: viscous mud or  a viscous, glutinous, or gelatinous substance: such as a mucous or mucoid secretion of various animals (such as slugs and catfishes)” –Merriam Webster Dictionary

“Someone that you are involved with and really care about and would do anything for them” – Urban Dictionary (My personal favourite)

I went ahead and asked a few special people if they would still be my friend/love me if I were a slime? Many were skeptical and borderline entertained by the question while others answered without hesitation about their initial sentiment towards my new form.

Here are some responses I received:

“I would love you regardless, what kind of question is that whether or not I will love my child if they were a “cripple” of some sort- yes I would love you….is this some sort of test…is this what you ask yourself when you have long walks outdoors?”- Nelly (Mother Dearest)

“YES” – Navneet (BFF)

“Well would you being able to fit everywhere ?

Yes, I would be malleable – Me

We would make a good team” – Eva (My sister)

“If you were a slime or slimy I wouldn’t be your friend…. I hate amphibians” Tadiwa (My ride or die)

“No..EWW” – Fatmi (aka Phatima)

“like you were just made of slime? if you could still communicate and had the same personality yes, but I think we’d do mostly outdoor activities” – Emily ( my wife)

Here’s my monologue as a slime making friends, battling demons and dragons, and living the purest reincarnated life one could ask for:

The Time I Got Reincarnated

By Eunice

“I woke up and my body felt different. It was hollow and I could not feel my limbs. And I don’t think I’m dead yet. My “heart” is pounding and it feels like I am about to burst. And I mean literally too! Breathe,and Breathe again and open your eyes.”

Looking at myself on the reflective surface of my stove

“Huh? Is this real life or am I staring at jello or is the jello staring at me.This is it! You have been waiting for this moment to be reincarnated and not only that but a whole other universe. But why lord, why spirits of reincarnation in carnation did you decide that my kind soul should return into this. I mean I know I should have been nice to my pet gerbil when I was seven, and maybe I shouldn’t have prayed for certain peoples quick demise, and overall made better choices but THIS…. Ah – I. I’m a gelatinous, viscous, slimy, giggle of a gorgeous creature. OOOh look at the way my translucent skin glows, Korean beauty gurus could never achieve this level of dewy.”

*starts rolling around the kitchen and realize*

“I’m so squishy, and flexible and I have no feet or hands. I wonder if I can squeeze into hard places, and swallow other things and become them like that anime. Wait a minute, this looks familiar, I have the same camel teapot at home. What a mundane world,not a dungeon nor a cave.”

Someone outside “Stevie awww what a good boy! yes you oh yes” *kissing noises*

“ARGH!!! You mean to tell me I got reincarnated back in 2020, and not only that I’m still me. In my home with the same neighbour and her mousy dog Stevie. My brain could not have imagined a more original setting to begin this scene. We could have been anywhere, literally anywhere. The possibilities- ENDLESS! I would even like to be the slime in one of the Kardashian’s homes. They might actually mistake me for one of their silicone implants. I probably only have ten more minutes before I wake up again (I’m a terrible insomniac, who wakes up periodically throughout the night and never missed a sunrise). I could feel someone staring at my back. I should turn around, maybe say “Yo, whats up” but what if it is my mom ( I know how much she hates vermin), she’ll kill me with no hesitation. I could feel something leaking , oh my did I just pee myself. Embarrassing, no? YES, absolutely (now I’m talking to myself). But what just came out of me is that slime secretion? This is not what I imagined. MOM WAIT IT’S -“

*Encased in darkness*

“It just gets better for me huh? We’re moving, we stopped moving, I hear the door opening and it’s still dark. I’m in some sort of plastic bag. Did she.. no she couldn’t have not the trash! AH, I leaked again! Please please not the dumpster where there’s mice, and smelly suspicious things. I see the light, she finally opens the bag. Oh this is our garden… AAAAAHHHHHH! I’m on top of something, the ground feels grainy, and this distinctive aroma like musty rain on a rainy night…oh hey those are my gardenias, and I’m sinking, now I see their roots..eww a worm get away from me don’t you dare..I’m sinking and it’s dark again. I feel like the world around me is becoming wider and I feel so full. I feel myself stretching, and reaching, and taking more and more surface now I’m encircling the roots of an old tree and it’s saying hello, new creature welcome..and at some point I was no longer conscious of where I was or who I am. I was all and one. “

*SNOOZE ALARM RINGS*

Thank you for reading our second article of our monologue series! It was treat writing it and I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did imagining it! – Eunice

If you have a monologue that you have written and would love to share it contact us today!

Slime image reference: https://hokagestorez.com/that-time-i-got-reincarnated-as-a-slime-anime-season-2-set-for-2020/